I am where I need to be....

Earlier today I read PinQue's lastest blog post on babies, friends with babies and well not having babies. It really struck a chord with me. Then I read the link that Michelle put in her post from Elements of Style and it was not only encouraging but inspiring. It really put into words all that I've been feeling lately and haven't been able to express.

Last week for me sucked. Majorly sucked. There is no other way to say that Tuesday of last week broke me. How I not only allowed one person (a guy) to make me feel so insignificant and small but how since then I've been having continual anxiety attacks and questioning my value. May is my birthday month, which means in 10 days I will be turning 29. Which scares me to death that I am on the door of 30. I keep questioning myself, shouldn't I be somewhere else by now? Shouldn't I at least be with someone who is a possible candidate for a husband? What is wrong with me? I've been trying to psychoanalyze myself and I only end up with chest pains with the feeling that the world is crashing down on me as well as feeling worse about myself.

Thankfully, I have an amazing family and incredible friends who have been supportive...especially after last week. My mom had me over for dinner twice last week so I wouldn't be alone wallowing. She let me cry but also said, this doesn't deserve but a few days of your sadness (or something like that) and she is right.
I had appetizers and drinks with my dear friend and coworker, Erin, last night who said to me: I wish you would see yourself the way I see you...and I would do the same for myself (see herself as I see her). That stuck with me. We females look at ourselves in the mirror and at our life/circumstances and tear ourselves apart. Yet, we always see the best in everyone else. I can be the worst about that. I don't know how to accept a compliment because deep down, I don't know if I believe the words being spoken to me. But I can easily tell one of my friends how wonderful they are and when I am saying I speak absolute truth.

There were several pieces of the Elements of Style post that really spoke to me. The following paragraph spoke volumes to me because it is something I am continually saying. I no longer know how to relate to my friends who have kids. Some of my friends have become mothers recently and though they are no longer just a wife, they've still have created a sense of balance and can carry on conversations that mention motherhood but it is not the center of what they discuss. But then there are times I would rather stay at home than go out with some of my mommy friends because that seems like the only thing they can talk about. What can I contribute to a conversation about nap schedules, feedings, and the development of a child? I have a furry child and live alone.

But it’s hard feeling like the odd girl out.  The only one without a baby saddled on her hip. A great job, husband and house- yes- but not that one thing that seems to bind women together.  It’s only natural for mothers, especially new moms, to spend more time with others going through what they are, but I can’t help but notice how motherhood sometimes draws a line in the sand between those with kids and those without.  People you used to meet for a drink or hang out with seem to disappear from your radar.  Dinner dates become fewer.  Emails less frequent.  It’s heartbreaking, yet understandable when it happens.  People latch on to those who are experiencing the same things as they are, it’s only natural.  I’m sure they feel that talking about the all the minute details of motherhood would bore those of us who aren't going through it, and NOT talking about it would be like trying to write a novel without using vowels. Impossible.  So there is a natural separation.

She is so right. It is a natural separation but that separation makes me sad. It makes me long for a time when things were easier. I guess that is human nature though. We want to be older and by the time we reach being older we wish we were in our youth again.

I have no great words of wisdom for this post. Only that I am thankful for friends who are understanding that I am still a single girl. For friends like Michelle who are honest about where they are in their journey. Or for my single friends who can really relate to where I am. So I leave you with the words at the end of the Elements of Style post and hope that this is not only encouraging but a push forward to enjoying the moment:

And it may not be a baby for you.  It may be a ring, or a house, or a job.  There is always something that makes you feel your life in not the one you had hoped or planned for.  That there is something missing, incomplete or off.  And the thing to remember is that it will ALWAYS be this way no matter what age you are. Instead of looking and the boxed left unchecked on our life “to do” list we should be looking at the ones we HAVE checked off.  Everyone’s life plan is different and we miss the joy of what’s happening to us right now if we consistently focus on what’s not.  It’s all very zen and “namaste” of me to say, but we do need to be more present. I need to be more present. Yes, I need to be vigilant about my health and have a plan so that I can make sure I can have a baby someday, but focusing on that is making me miss the wonderful things going on right now, of which there are many.

I am where I need to be.  And I’ll be somewhere else soon enough.

Shop Charlotte!

It is finally here the first big event for J. Leigh Events and I am excited to announce that it is a shopping tour of Charlotte! How appropriate, right? When Julia of Fifi's Fine Resale in Cornelius approached us about this event we were not only thrilled that she asked us to coordinate it but ecstatic because it is right up our alley. 

Join us for an unique and fun day of shopping the local boutiques of Charlotte. We will be taking a bus tour to the following boutiques: Fifi's of Lake Norman, Cheeky Bean in Ballentyne, JLC WearHouse, Summerbird, and JT Posh. You will not only receive a swag bag but will also receive a discount for your purchases at each boutique. Lunch will be provided along the tour. 

What better way to get a day of shopping in than being chauffeured from Lake Norman to Ballantyne to Dilworth shopping with your friends!

For more information or to participate in the event check out the Facebook event page! And you can buy tickets here!

The event is June 22 so mark your calendars now and get your tickets because there is limited seating. 

Weekend Update: Jam Packed

I started to write this post last week as you can see I never finished it and have already gone through another weekend. Because this post is a week overdue I am going to do a quick rundown. Lots of pictures very little text. That way I can play catch up and post on the more recent weekend.

Have you ever had one of those weekends when Sunday afternoon hits and you finally have a moment to yourself, you can finally breath a sigh of relief and relaxation? That was this weekend for me...non-stop!

 I kicked off the weekend early at Queen City Q with their trivia. I have been going for several weeks now and it is a good way to end the Thursday and prep for Friday.

I went to the Tristan Prettyman concert with Katy on Friday night. It was a phenomenal concert, even the opening act was great, which was Anya Marina. Both excellent artist, it was one of those shows that  really makes you appreciate music and the emotion behind it. Afterward we stopped into The Queen City Q for their bread pudding. It was so good! We couldn't finish it.

I had an early start on Saturday with picking up contracts from clients and birthday present shopping. I had an afternoon birthday party for Hailey, who turned one years old. Followed by a joint birthday celebration for my parents. My mom ended up being sick that weekend so we had a low-key dinner at their house. Afterward I thought it was a good idea to just add one more thing to my day. I ended up heading to Suite for a bit of dancing with the girls uptown.

Sunday I took the pup to Latta Plantation where you walked the trails and she got to meet a few horses...then she proceeded to growl at them as though they were giant dogs. (I am rolling my eyes as I type that). Afterward I met up with the lovely D's (Diana & Dion) for lunch at 131 Main! It had been ages since I had been so I ordered one of my favorites on the menu, Thai Steak Salad. Hits the spot every time. We ended up being there for several hours just talking and brainstorming. I am really lucky to know such talented and smart women.

I finished up the day by going home and spending more quality time with the pup. Even though it was one of those non-stop weekends it was really great. Now onto writing another blog post about THIS weekend. Better late than never, right?

Roar!

Earlier this month Modnique posted this picture on their Facebook page and I immediately fell in love with the skirt. And the longer I looked at the more I fell in love with the entire outfit. Two friends told me I could pull it off, so I am considering recreating it for concert season. I figured since the outfit was so unique it may take me a little while to piece it together.

What do you think of this tiger look? Too much? Just right?

Silver Linings Playbook

My Wednesday morning was treating me like it was a Monday morning. Between running around like a lunatic trying to get out of the house in time, the outfit I thought of in my head just wasn't working for me, then the dog got mud on my pants, and when I finally did get to work I realized I had my shirt on inside...oh and I kicked the power stripe to my computer so once I finally did get settled down I had to start all over. But I did not wear leopard...though I thought about it. I seriously thought, maybe I should wear leopard all week.

Yet I was determined to not let off of those little things get to me. Then by 9am, I had a girl moment. I have those girly emotional moments from time to time. Now I wasn't crying or anything...but just internally emotional. I was very thankful for text messaging and email at that moment because my friends Melanie and Erin talked some sense into me. Help me realize I wasn't being girly and without saying it I think they were both telling me to grow some balls and woman up. Be strong. It is hard being strong when fear is holding you back...in any situation. But the best thing I can do here is GET OUT OF MY HEAD! 

The day went on without a hitch and thankfully I had lunch plans with Jessie and her little one Levi. Who let me just say is the best little baby. He has slept the entire lunch the last two times we've gotten together...plus he is SUPER cute. We had lunch at Dilworth Neighborhood Grille, which I can walk to from work a nice plus! We split the Spedie Chicken Pie, and I am so glad that Jessie suggested we order it because it was very flavorful! Perfect lunch with a side salad.

For the evening I had plans with two of my favorite people, Melanie and Jessica...and Jessica's hubs joined us to. We went to see Silver Linings Playbook, it was one of those really great movies. It had enough funny parts to help deal with the serious topic but it also had this air of happiness in it. By the end of the movie I was crying. Yes, I cry at movies. As Melanie said, I am tenderhearted. Even on the way home I was emotional. With all that said, everyone should go see this movie.

That was my weird Wednesday and all I have to say is that I am glad I am only one more day away from Friday.

Obsession

You know how some of us have too much of one particular color in our closet and every time we go shopping we say, I don't need another black dress or I don't need another pink top. I am usually saying that about black, most of us are. However, I did not realize how much my love for leopard print had recently gotten out of control. I say this as I am wearing a leopard print dress, wore a leopard print sweater yesterday and a top on Friday night.

Friday's Outfit

Monday's Outfit

I realized this print has currently taken over my closet this morning as the outfit I was going to wear wasn't working for me. I was having an I do not feel pretty in this moment.So I grabbed the leopard print dress and realized that I had worn leopard yesterday as well. But it was one of those I am already running late and this an easy throw on dress. So I guess this means I need to cut back on the leopard print and start adding another print to my closet. 

What is your I am obsessed with color, print, or piece? What do you have too much of in the closet? I challenge you to be bold and don't fall into your comfort zone. 

The Day I Wore A Bowtie: Front Row Charlotte

Lately I have had some really great adventures, that I haven't had the time to blog about...don't worry they are coming soon. I am going to sit down on Sunday and just type my little heart out. Until then let me tell you about my Thursday evening that consisted of some of my most fabulous friends (not all of them), a fashion show, and some delicious eats.

My front row buddies: In The Queen City (Kseniya) and PinQueenCity (Michelle)

Before the show, I got to mingle with a lot of folks that I only know by their Twitter handle and avator, but it is always nice to finally shake hands with people you do social media with. I also was lucky enough to sit next to the ladies of Safe Alliance, the non-profit group that Front Row Charlotte tickets sales went to.

My favorite looks of the night came from Monkee's of Lake Norman

Safe Alliance receiving their check! A sweet moment

The show consisted of  looks from local area boutiques with pop up shops on location to buy what you saw in the show. How clever! One of the best parts and the namesake of the show is that every seat was a front row seat, so everyone had the best seat in the house. Bravo to Erica and the rest of the team for pulling off an excellent event! I had a blast.

Photo courtesy of Katie

All of us ladies were quite hungry after the show, though there were some yummy food truck bites there...we made a pit stop at the photo booth and what you see above is the result. There are no words.

Again...I stole this photo from Katie

Oh and of course their had to be a red carpet shot. And yes, I am wearing pink pants and I bowtie...that is just how I roll. Overall it was a really great night! I love seeing all of my friends dolled up and then some of us followed it up by eating a big burger. Like myself. Feast your eyes below.

then I ate this.

Donations Needed: Cooperative Christian Ministry

I am a firm believer in giving back, since I have been blessed with so much. My mom is a part of the Cooperative Christian Ministry in Concord and they are looking for a few donations for an upcoming event to celebrate the volunteers that help run CCM.

Cooperative Christian Ministry is a nonprofit organization that helps people out with food,shelter,housing and financial assistance. Some of the programs are the crisis center, food pantry, homeless shelter, soup kitchen and mother and children house.They have over 200 volunteers who give of their time and resources. For more information about CCM please visit their website.

The reason for this blog post is because they are having their annual volunteer picnic to honor the over 200 volunteers on April 18th are in need of the following items. If you or someone you know can help out in any way by offering the following items for free or at a discount price my mom, Jeannie Merritt, can be reached by email at jmerritt15@carolina.rr.com. You or your organization will be recognized at the picnic, thank you in advance for your generosity. The following is a list of items needed on April 18. 

Items Needed 

• Hot dogs and buns
• Hamburger and buns
• prizes or gift cards for our raffles
• helium balloons
• cash donations
• flowers for our tables
• sheet cake or pans of brownies

In Just a Minute...February

photo credit

Okay, so we are 8 days into February  but I wanted to a review of January and a preview of what February is going to bring. I use to do these types of posts frequently...well when I blogged more frequently... It's a round-up or reflection of all the great things that have happened during the month. Also really handy for inspiration.

Reading...Gone Girl - if you have not read this book, go buy or download...Now! I haven't even finished it and I like it that much. Twisted, very. I cannot seem to put it down, last night was the first time I've actually watched TV. In January, I finished the book The Art of Racing in the Rain - so good...though it is an emotional roller coaster and I will no tell a lie, I cried. 

Listening...to a lot of great new (to me) music, currently as I write this I am listening to Let Her Go by Passengers. I have been trying to check out the venues in Charlotte to see what artists I may like and go check them out. Support the little guy, right? Also...thanks to a friend from high school posting this on Instagram, I discovered Brother Leather. So good. Go to their website and you can download the entire album. 

Wishing...for spring! I think if I were to look back at posts from this time of year, they would all say the same thing. I WANT SPRING! This Florida girl can only take so much winter weather. 

Looking...forward to our (J.Leigh Events) future and our styled shoot next weekend!

Wearing...just a little more make-up than I normally do...and actually taking the time to put lipstick on. It really makes all the difference.  

How is your February going? How was your January?

Food Club (The Epic Eaters)

If you follow me on Twitter or Instagram then you have probably come to realize I love food just as much as I love fashion. But not just food as in I sit on my couch while a frozen pizza heats in the oven at 375 for 40 mins. I enjoy an amazing plate of food that will make my taste buds sing it's praises as I chew and have me saying mmmm involuntarily. Luckily, Charlotte has an excellent food scene that is not only thriving but also growing. Which means I get to try a variety of yummy and different eats.

A few months ago what started as a group of girls getting together randomly at first has turned it, what Jen referred to as The Food Club...we really like to refer to ourselves as Epic Eaters, we even have a hashtag. Thankfully, we don't always just eat but we like to add a workout in from time to time. A girl has to watch her figure if she is going to continue to eat such amazing eats. Current members of Epic Eaters includes: Brittney of Life in a Holding Pattern, Diana of The Chic Life, Dion from WCNC, Erin of The Lovely Day, Jen from Peanut Butter Runner, Kseniya of In the Queen City, and Michelle from PinQue. 

About 3 years ago, I did a post on a list of restaurants in the area that I love followed by a list of places I needed to try. As much as I have been eating a great spots in Charlotte, I have yet to scratch the surface of the places to try. I wanted revisit my list from 2010 as well as revise it with my latest ventures and reviews.

My Faves 

A list of places I have been and will return to

2010 List
131 Main
I've been a 131 Main fan for years, now I will admit I've only been to the Lake Norman location...but it is definitely one of my favorite places to hit. I have never been disappointed with any of their dishes. My two favorites: Thai Steak Salad & Ahi Tuna Salad both dishes have an incredible blend of flavors. It is like a party in my mouth.

New Comments: 131 Main is still one of my favorite go to spots in the area, the last time I was there I had their Farmer's Plate, which is a vegetarian dish, and I was quite pleased with it.

Amelie's  
What is better than a French bakery? A French bakery that is open 24/7. I just recently discovered Amelie's earlier this year..and fell in love at first bite! I have loved everything I've had. Just delicious and delightful. Amelie's also has this eclectic decor, everywhere you look it is another beautiful and appealing piece. If you ever get the chance to just sit and enjoy your pastry! Just breath and look around. Enjoy the peaceful atmosphere.

New Comments: I cannot get enough of Amelie's! Whenever I have someone come in from out of town I make sure they visit before leaving. I even bought their Salted Caramel Brownies on my way to FL this year to take to my friend who was hosting me in her home.  

Big Daddy's Burger Bar  
I've blogged about this place numerous times...because it is a darn good burger. When I want a real good burger, that is what I begin to crave. I love the variety of their burger types and that you can build your own. Sweet Tater has been trying all the black bean burgers in Charlotte and the last I heard Big Daddy's was still at the top of the list.

New Comments: When I originally posted about Big Daddy's they were still well, Big Daddy's Burgers. Since then they have gone through a name change and are now Bad Daddy's. Still great atmosphere and amazing burgers. Also, since then I have had their black bean burger which most definitely lives up to the hype. 

Blue 
The first time I went to Blue was after seeing Peter Pan at the Blumenthal Theater, and we went strictly for dessert. The dessert alone was delicious and amazing enough to strike a chord with me and have the desire to go back. And I have having yet another meal that went far beyond my expectations.

Cajun Queen 
If you want authentic really good cajun food, then you will definitely find it at the Cajun Queen. I love food with a bit of spark and spice, that is how authentic cajun food should taste. Everything is amazing about this restaurant down to the decor of the house it is in. High on my list!

Crepe Cellar 
This cozy little restaurant is a definite gem to the NoDa area. My personal fave item from here is the pesto brie fries. Yum! I have had a variety of their crepes and I have never been disappointed. I've heard that their brunch is fabulous. I definitely need to make a stop there one morning. 

Cantina 1511

Dandelion Market

Mert's Heart & Soul 
The Penguin
Pewter Rose

New Comments: Pewter Rose has closed since my original post. They will be having a send off meal, so to say...I will be there as well as my Epic Eater friends! 

Price's Chicken Coop

Toast

Zada Janes

2013 List

5Church
5Church is fairly new to the area, but it is the new hot spot and there is no denying why. The food is not only spectacular but the atmosphere is as well. I've only been for brunch twice and one evening for drinks during the Panther pre-season each of those visits were memorable. I have yet to have the lamb burger but everyone raves about it. If you are looking to venture uptown for a meal I highly recommend trying 5Church. Oh and get the fries! Seriously. 

Cabo Fish Taco
Again, one of those staples in Charlotte that I cannot believe it took me so long to try. I know some people think fish and tacos and the idea is foreign to them which I don't understand. It is such a simple yet great combination of flavors. The thing about Cabo it is cheap, filling, and reliable. It fits in perfectly to the NoDa neighborhood. Just a warning though, if you go on the weekend you will have a wait. (Cabo Fish Taco was on my list of Must Visit in 2010) 

Cowfish
If you love sushi then you will love Cowfish. The unusual thing about Cowfish that sets it apart from other sushi restaurants is their sushi-inspired burgers and their burger-inspired sushi. When you go, let me just say this now: order the Crab Rangoon Dip or the Ahi Tuna Nachos....you can thank me later. Or just invite me out and I will help you eat them. Either one is acceptable.  My favorite thing to get is the bento box special, you get a mini specialty burger, a choice of sushi, edamame and sweet potato fries. If you just want sushi, give the Neon Dion a try named after Dion Lim of WCNC. 

Soul Gastrolounge
I don't know what took me so long to try Soul but the items on their menu makes me heart sing. I never really liked mushrooms until I had their marinated mushrooms and now I order them every time I go for dinner. Soul not only has an excellent dinner menu but a brunch menu as well and if you want some entertainment on a Sunday morning then go for Disco Brunch, you will not be disappointed. 

Queen City Q
BBQ is a touchy food topic for people because it can be done is so many different varieties and as we all should people the pride of about the food from their region. That is my disclaimer for BBQ before I start my review. Queen City is the best damn BBQ you can get in Charlotte, if you would like to prove me wrong tweet me and we will meet up to throw down on some! I love ribs. LOVE them. And the Q does ribs very well, as do they do everything else. Their pulled pork comes to the table sauce-less so you can decide what region of BBQ you want to partake in. A friend of mine came in from Texas, tried their brisket and approved. That is the best compliment and I will elaborate no more. Another great quality about Queen City is their selection of local beers...and before I forget validated parking. 

Recent Visits

A list of places that I have recently visted that could become quick favorites

The Blue Taj

Luce 
I went to for the first time this week. It is currently restaurant week here in the Queen City and I was invited to have dinner out at Luce. I left feeling full and satisfied because I ate every bite of food. Every bite. Sometimes when you think Italian the first thing that comes to mind our heavy pasta but everything I ordered was so light and delicious...I just ate a lot of it. If you want a date night I would suggest you try Luce. 

Vietnam Grille
I am going to have an honest moment with you all, my first time to Vietnam Grille was on Wednesday night...of this week. Not only was it my first time, but my friends Dion and Kseniya (who are regulars) ordered for me. It was such a tasty experience, I am adding it to the list. This place is a regular spot for a lot of people I know and they only rave about the food. I cannot wait to go back. May next week. 

Suggestions
A list of places I have never been, but have been told to visit.
 

2010 List
Basil (suggested by Foodie Fresh)
Cabo Fish Taco (suggested by Meredith P)  - as you read, I finally made it to Cabo Fish Taco and love it.
Carpe Diem (suggested by Life in a Holding Pattern) - I've only been to Carpe Diem for drinks, must go back for dinner soon. 

Copper (suggested by Mark K)

Customshop (suggested by Don't Forget Dessert)
Dim Sum (suggested by Russel P & Laura Y)
Dolce Vita (suggested by Laura J)

Fiamma (suggested by CaseyLBrewton)

Fran's Filling Station (suggested by Don't Forget Dessert) - I went to Fran's Filling Station for the first time in the fall of 2012, it was excellent. I must visit again soon. If you've never been, make it a point to try it out.
Intermezzo (suggested by Willow Bird Baking)
Roasting Company (suggested by JJ Horton Photography)

Spice 9 (suggested by Willow Bird Baking) - This is an excellent Indian restaurant and have a very large buffet. I highly recommend this place especially if you live in the N. Charlotte/Concord region. 

Whiskey Warehouse (suggested by All in a Huff)

Out of the thirteen suggestions on the original list, I've only made it to four of them and one of those places was just for drinks. Oh no! I must do something about this. So many places to eat. So little time. 

2013 List
E2
King's Kitchen
Musashi Japanese
Ru San's  
I went to Ru San's years ago, but they have an all you can eat sushi buffet at lunch that I've been dying to try. 

I think that is it for now. Do you have a suggestion where the Epic Eaters should go next or a place I should try? I am looking forward to a lot of incredible eats in 2013. I know I am probably forgetting some place that I visit often and will have a doh! moment once someone suggests it. 

Where is your favorite place to eat in Charlotte?